My human has been bawling since Christmas because “Santa didn’t bring me a new horse.” Excuse me, ‘New Horse’? What the hell am I, dog food? Yes, I might be a bit long in the tooth at 22 but I can still canter with the best of ‘em, jump a fallen log in the woods, buck like a rodeo star, and lead the herd in pasture games. I’ve been her go-to ride for 18 years and saved her ass so many times, I lost count. Now SHE’S dumping ME? What gives?
Signed, Not Ready for Retirement