Dear Appy:

 I got in a lot of hot water recently when I smarted off to my new person. You know that feeling you get from standing in one place for too long? Well, I tried to quietly tell her I was cranky and sore after an eight hour ride to my new home, not to mention being nervous, but she was oblivious and I kind of lost it. Apparently biting is not considered an acceptable form of communication for humans. I was shocked by her reaction. Was I wrong?

Signed,

Muskrat

Dear Muskrat,

I have found most humans to be quick learners if a little dim sometimes and they can be frustrating to teach. That said, biting wasn’t your best idea. Effective, yes, but not a long term training solution and it often backfires. You didn’t give your age but I suspect you’re young since biting is a rookie move. Remember, these humans aren’t as evolved as we are and it can take forever for them to learn how to communicate. They’re so happy to be with us that they don’t always know when to back off. Be patient. Make faces, shake your head, use your ears but keep your teeth (and your heels) to yourself. If all else fails, find ways to shame them into cognition. I find a strategically placed nudge into the water trough can work wonders. Best of luck! 

Appy